Sunday, May 10, 2015

To the Moms Without Their Babies

I have had a terrific Mother's Day. I slept in-ish. My husband and sons gave me some incredible gifts, both impressive and meaningful. I got to sit in a friend's living room and enjoy a bloody mary (or two) while having conversation with four other women that have wild and crazy boys near my oldest son's age. Then all of our families went to a laughter filled lunch. We came home and I napped.  We picked up fresh flowers to take to a couple of the special ladies that my boys love.

I very truly had one of the best Mother's Days I can remember.

Yet, I feel sad.  I recently posted on my Facebook wall an article about how to explain miscarriage to a sibling.  One of the things that it talked of is how moms may have another child after a loss, they still may grieve significantly this child they lost.

It is like that for me.

A high school friend messaged me about three months ago to tell me she was very excitedly expecting for the first time. We talked a little about how nervous she was, and about my successful and unsuccessful pregnancies.  Sadly, a month ago that she too lost her pregnancy and was devastated.

Last night I messaged her, Happy Mother's Day.  We talked briefly, and I wanted her know, she deserved a Mother's Day well-wish.

Today, while buying the flowers for my own mother and the pseudo-grandmother for my boys I saw her.  I hugged her.  For the first time in probably ten years I saw her and was able to hug her a Happy Mother's day.

I wish I could hug all of the moms who have had a loss and tell them Happy Mother's Day.  They deserve to be recognized as well.

Please know, if you're part of the most undesired mom's club in the world and have lost a pregnancy or child, you are still a mother.  You are appreciated. You are thought of.


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