To the Moms Without Their Babies

I have had a terrific Mother's Day. I slept in-ish. My husband and sons gave me some incredible gifts, both impressive and meaningful. I got to sit in a friend's living room and enjoy a bloody mary (or two) while having conversation with four other women that have wild and crazy boys near my oldest son's age. Then all of our families went to a laughter filled lunch. We came home and I napped.  We picked up fresh flowers to take to a couple of the special ladies that my boys love.

I very truly had one of the best Mother's Days I can remember.

Yet, I feel sad.  I recently posted on my Facebook wall an article about how to explain miscarriage to a sibling.  One of the things that it talked of is how moms may have another child after a loss, they still may grieve significantly this child they lost.

It is like that for me.

A high school friend messaged me about three months ago to tell me she was very excitedly expecting for the first time. We talked a little about how nervous she was, and about my successful and unsuccessful pregnancies.  Sadly, a month ago that she too lost her pregnancy and was devastated.

Last night I messaged her, Happy Mother's Day.  We talked briefly, and I wanted her know, she deserved a Mother's Day well-wish.

Today, while buying the flowers for my own mother and the pseudo-grandmother for my boys I saw her.  I hugged her.  For the first time in probably ten years I saw her and was able to hug her a Happy Mother's day.

I wish I could hug all of the moms who have had a loss and tell them Happy Mother's Day.  They deserve to be recognized as well.

Please know, if you're part of the most undesired mom's club in the world and have lost a pregnancy or child, you are still a mother.  You are appreciated. You are thought of.

Crying Over Spilt Milk

There's the saying, "There's no good crying over spilt milk," which is to say that huffing and puffing over something that has already happened, that wasn't that big of a deal anyway, is silly.   Unless it's pumped breastmilk. That shit is liquid gold and I have totally bawled over accidentally knocking over a bag of freshly squeezed boob juice.

Really, I let little things go. Especially that lowly cow's milk (insert sancti-mommy "human milk for human babies" phrase and eyeroll).

But today.  Today is different.

It's 8am. I had a heck of a day yesterday and spent a good portion at the Mac Store repairing this trusty companion I write with to you today.  This morning I started finishing editing and copying images for a photography client that should have been completed yesterday.

I few moments ago I heard the familiar ting of a spoon in a cereal bowl. Ah, morning.

WHAT.

The kids already ate twenty minutes ago.  The breakfast table is clear. Why is that sound happening? Why is that sound happening in our living room?

I crept around the half wall to find E3 banging around in Daddy's cereal bowl he left on the end table.  There was just enough milk and Cheerios hanging out in it to pour down the side of the armchair and mash into the carpet.

UUUGGGHH. I had to gather the cleaning supplies and go forth to the battle field.  While battling the milk soaking into the carpet pad that will undoubtedly make that corner of the living room sour for a month, I hear it.

It's a splash followed by a plastic bump.  Instinctively I know.

You see, E2 has this habit of taking a few bites of breakfast then wandering around for twenty minutes. He will again sit to eat no less than three moments before we have to rush out the door to make whatever appointment we are already late for.

Which means one thing: E3 struck again.  I made it to kitchen to see the milk dripping off of the table and chair onto my freshly cleaned hardwood. E3 was trying to use Big Brother's spoon to eat the remaining CoCo Puffs out of the bowl.

I had to clean an even bigger mess and just tossed him into the high chair with the remaining floor soup.

I think I give up. If you come over, bring house shoes. My floors are sticky.

All Aboard the NOPE Train

This past weekend Husband Dearest and I got to go on our first EVER over night trip together where I wasn't pregnant. Make note: That was October 2009, ya'll. I'm telling you this just so I can share a couple pictures and then move on to the story you want to hear.

Hip (Hip Hooray! It's OK! ((we think))

Anybody with a four year old, particularly a four year old on the very top of the growth chart knows, growing pains a very real thing. It will take your happy go lucky little guy or gal and turn them into a screamy little thing that Ibuprofen and snuggles can hardly alleviate. Then BAM. It's gone as fast as it started.

According to KidsHealth.org, the average four year old boy is 40 lbs and about 40 inches tall. E2 is 49 lbs and according to the doctor's office, right at 47 inches tall. He has grown two and half inches in five months. If you do the math, he's growing at a rate of an eight of an inch PER WEEK.

A Big Old Handful

I can't make this stuff up. 

Today is not trash day. Tomorrow is trash day. I thought that I would be a good little housewife today and clean the trash from the garage to make Husband Dearest happy, then drag all the trash out to the curb tonight, instead of scrambling to get it done in the morning. While I was dragging things out to the curb, I could hear little E3 screeching inside the house. Not a screech of pain, but his very discernible "I'm pissed!" screech. I did not hurry. As I was about to pick up all the little pieces of junk the big dogs had shredded and strewn about the garage, E2 opens the door, "Mama, E3 is stuck." Sigh. E3 has recently learned how to climb unsecured drawers in the kitchen. There's only three or four drawers and they have all of the kid cups in them or are empty. The boys love to play with them and it keeps me from needing to get E2 a cup every. single. time. he's sssssooooo ttttthhiirrssttyyy. 

When I reentered the house, leaving all the bits and pieces of trash around the garage, I saw he was definitely stuck. E3 had climbed into the bottom drawer, then pulled the next drawer open over the top of him. He did the same thing the day prior, only he flipped out and smushed his face on the hardwood floor giving him Baby's First Bloody Nose. 

After disengaging Baby Climbs A Lot, I tried to go back to my trash pick up duty. "Mama, I have to poop," a deadpanned four year old snuck in front of me, just to make me very aware of his bodily function necessities. He then turned and walked to the bathroom. 

I just stood there, shaking my head. My daily conversations have changed a lot since I went to working only part time. E3 shot through the living room, tailing brother. At least I'm not the only person that doesn't get to poop in peace. 

FINALLY I could at least replace the trash bag in the kitchen. Just as I'm shaking the bag to put it in the can my sweet, darling little E2 yells from the shitter, "Moooom, he's going to touch the poop!"

WHAT. 

HOW can a BABY touch POOP IN the toilet? 

I ran. But not fast enough. "Mooom he's holding the poooooop!"

He was holding the poop. E2 stood up to wipe his butt (yay he's wiping his own ass! That's a big hairy deal!) as he hasn't mastered the lean technique yet. In doing so, he left the pot open for the unleashing of ninja moves from our 10 month old angel baby E3.  

When I skid into the bathroom, E3 was bringing his hand out of the toilet with a nice, big chunk of poop smashed in his tiny little fist. 

Now get on my level. Slow things down a bit. Let's give this image that special effect 3D image of zoom. He's bringing his hand to his face, he's opening his mouth... 

NOOOOO!

He stopped just as I smacked his hand down, making him cry and throwing half the turd back into the toilet, half onto the tile. I saved him. I saved me. No poop was consumed. 

I scooped little E3 up and immediately thrust his hands under the sink to scrub. I'm flustered, to say the least. As I'm scrubbing his little poop scoops, I hear the door open. Husband's home. "Court, did you miss the trash!? The trash is still out!? And you didn't pick up the garage..."

Organization Challenge Week 3: The Pantry

Still catching up on the A Bowl Full of Lemons organization challenge. I've finished the pantry and will move onto the master bedroom this week.

There's not much to say regarding my food pantry.

The before was a cluster f*ck.

The after isn't.

I don't really like the storage bins I'm using, but after nearly pissing myself after looking up the cost of the OXO containers, Imma ride this one out.

Playing with Annie: A Chalk Paint Experience

A couple weeks ago I decided I had HAD IT with my kitchen table and chairs.  The set, originally my grandparents, has survived their family of four, my parents family of four, and now is on our family of four. The chairs have been gorilla glued, screwed and nailed (kinky, I know) every which way. The table with a veneered top has been marked on, magic erasered, stabbed and the leaf completely warped (and that was just from me).

I've been pinning furniture redo projects since I did the Pinecone baby furniture a year ago. Es 1 and 2 were gone for the the weekend, and I had my chance. I looked up my dealer stockiest, the Annie Sloan term for retailer, and went for a visit.

I landed at Bella B Decor in Stanley, KS. I went in and introduced myself to Very Helpful Lady (she told me her name, but after I told her I was going to feature this project on my blog, she politely asked that she not be identified- so OBVIOUSLY she is a Secret Chalk Paint Agent. Obvsly.), and told her that after I browsed I would for sure need some help.

First, this store is really cool. Not only does it feature repurposed and refinished vendor booths but there were also really cool  boutique clothing booths alongside the normal decor.

A beautiful setup for Annie Sloan Chalk Paint at Bella B Decor

The Annie Sloan and Milk Paint sections are well thought out, displaying all the color options as well as examples and previous works. Bella B offers some really neat classes showcasing design and work principles of chalk and milk paint. I'd love to take one of these classes in the near future.

I told VHL (Very Helpful Lady!) about what I was wanting to accomplish, showed her the current condition of my sad sad table and she set me up with some ideas. I settled on Annie Sloan Burgundy. for my "pop" of color. It's a reddish wine, and I'd show you an example, but I guess it's brand spankin' new because I cannot find it anywhere. Then I went with CoCo as my "over" color.  I also purchased the clear soft wax, although I do want to get the dark wax to add to my collection. The final purchase I made was a good wax brush. I'm super cheap and was having a hard time convincing myself to spend money on the paint plus brush, but I decided if I was doing it, I needed to do it right (for once).  VHL tried to add in a few point of sale purchases, but I held fast.
 Later that afternoon, I set to to work. The first thing I had to do was clean the grime and yuck off of the table legs and chairs. I had to call in reinforcements and get my friend Beck to come help.  Mostly because she brought chocolate liqueur.  After everything was thoroughly scrubbed and dry, I was ready. Okay, not really, I needed a pep talk and Beck pretty much had to shove me to start.

The first couple strokes are the hardest.
(That's what she said.)

The first thing I noticed was what a soft texture the paint had when applied to the table. It started to dry within a few minutes and was pretty thick. I did expect each quart to go a long way- it's nearly $37 so for that, it ought to stretch.

I worked on through the evening and had everything coated in the Burgundy for the next step.

The texture is incredibly soft- just like chalk!

I officially hate the chairs by this point. VHL told me that would happen, but boy was she right. See all those spindles? And the bottom section is basically another nine spindles on top of the nine on the back of the chair. The whole damn chair is made of spindles. And there's four of them. By now, after a million feed the baby breaks and not enough feed the mommy breaks, I'm ready to launch everything to the curb and head downtown to Hickory Dickory to buy a new set.

Once everything was sufficiently coated in burgundy, it was time to apply the Coco. The disappointment I have here is it's not as chocolatey as I expected. It's a grey base but between the grey in the Annie Sloan paint the the greige we had the house painted (which was happening at the same time, but we hired that out) I'm just over it.  I'm mad I didn't do a more drastic color change on our walls, and then the damn chairs seem to blend in.

Once the coco was applied and dried, sans table top, I got out the clear soft wax and my new fancy wax brush. Working in a circular motion, think Danny in Karate Kid- wax on, wax off- I began what might be my favorite step. In order to distress the furniture, I sanded small sections after wax was applied. This kept the dust down and made the top paint coat very easy to manipulate. I will say that the few pieces of sandpaper I got at Bella B were not going to cut it. I actually got out a nail file emery board and it did the trick perfectly.

I did a slightly different technique on the legs of the chairs- it really needed an additional coat of coco, but since I was SO. FREAKING. OVER. IT. we will just call this technique "Lazy It" and so there's no actual distressing on those legs- it's just a lack of paint. But it's good enough for the chicks I hang out with.

Here's the finished product. It takes about thirty days for the two coats of wax to cure (three on top of table) so we need to be careful with E3 not dumping chocolate milk all over and leaving it. Everyone is using a place mat and we have about 20 days of curing left. I think we'll make it.

My overall impression is that this is a really cool paint and techniques will vary as much as the style that influences you. Although I'm not enthralled with my color choices, I'm happy with the way the project itself turned out. I think the next item up for revitalizing is my jewelry stand left to me by my grandma. It's an old oak look that simply outdated but a very functional piece of furniture. I'll have to head back to Bella B to select something fun.

In case you're in KC and are interested in checking out the store, Bella B has several locations, although I would recommend stopping by the Stanley Station shop and saying hello to VHL. Here's their info:

http://bellabdecor.com
Bella B Decor7733 W. 151st Street, Overland Park, KS 66223 • 913-814-0300 • lynn@bellabdecor.comStore Hours: Mon-Sat 10-6 p.m, Sun 12-5 p.m.
Bella B Decor                                                          
11 W. Wea Street, Paola, KS 66071 • 913-294-4499 • lynn@bellabdecor.comStore Hours: Wed-Fri 10-5, Saturday 9-Noon
Bella B Decor @ The Painted Sofa  NEW LOCATION!!!                                                      
1413 W 11th Street, KC, MO 64101 • 816-474-8832
Store Hours: Wed-Fri 10-3, Sat 10-4
Week of First Friday Event: Fri 9-8, Sat 9-6, Sun 11-4
Bella B Decor @ La Bottega Vintage Market
173 English Landing Drive, Parkville, MO 64152 • 816-741-6255 • lynn@bellabdecor.com
Store Hours: Mon-Sat 10-5, Sun 12-5


http://www.anniesloan.com

  

Organization Challenge: WEEK 2 Laundry Wrap-Up

This week I was worried I wasn't going to finish, and much less START my organization challenge from A Bowl Full of Lemons. I had a bunch of sewing projects due out the door this week, so my evenings and "free" time were being hogged by that. We also had to select and buy paint for our painter (No, no, we don't do the painting on the walls in our house. I cannot tape to save my life and am reckless with a paintbrush. Bad idea.). He started prep work and painted the trim and walls in our master bath over the weekend. 

Want to see how crazy we got with the paint? Well good luck, because you can hardly even tell a difference.

For the record, we went with the bottom, #3. It's called "Amazing Gray SW7044" from Sherwin Williams. It's a couples shades off from what currently is on the walls but goes more to the "greige" versus beige. I'll update you on how this goes. 

Back to our story of the day. My laundry room is a multipurpose room in our home. It's a laundry room, duh, but also the main entry for our home through our garage, launch pad, and French Bulldog chill out space.  

I have recently purged and cleaned the lower cabinets so those were already in really good shape. The upper cabinets were a hot mess, as you can see below. 

First step: Change the light bulbs! The space was so dark and dreary. There were two of those funny fluorescent blue-ish bulbs, but of course, one was burnt out. I put in two fresh bulbs and Voila! I could see how badly everything needed cleaned. Boo. 

I started by taking everything out of the cabinets like suggested. This nearly gave me a brain aneurism. I posted a picture on Instagram and a friend of mine asked if Husband Dearest had a meltdown yet. Surprisingly, he did well with me stringing things across our kitchen. 

I luckily had some leftover containers and baskets from last week so I employed those with my cleaning items and made a new "whole home" cleaning caddy.  The difference in my cabinets and over all space is dramatic.

I am leaving the big sprucing up and decorating to the Launch Pad dedicated week around week 10. That will be closer to spring and I  will hopefully be ready to make some fun decor changes by then. 

Here it is, one last time. 

Before and after:

This coming week is the Pantry. I do hope that will be the easiest of the three first weeks as I could use a quick project. 

Mom Guilt: The Sleeping Baby

E3 smiles in his jumper while Big Brother rides a purple unicorn. 

Last night my family and I hung out with our back yard neighbors extended family. Like literally, hung out; see the picture.  E3 was intentionally put to bed and E2 cashed out on the couch watching Pocahontas.
  Side note: Every single time I see or hear something about the movie Pocahontas  I immediately picture the basement of Running with Racheal's parent's house and her singing one of the songs and me wanting to choke her because I couldn't stand it them. We were nine. I love it now. Sorry 'bout that, ShayShay. 

We had the kids home and in their own beds at a respectable time, for once.  That meant, ooh la la...uh, no, not that. It was shower time! For me! By myself! No one screaming at the shower door! No one needing me to open a cheese stick! No one crapping their pants and it spilling on to the carpet while I try to shave my vagina.  I lolligaged and got fully showered (Well, I didn't wash my hair, but come on, it was Friday. That only happens during the week, maybe.) and dressed in comfy PJs.  I checked on both boys and my head hit the pillow before 10:45pm.

Flash forward: 6:35am.

Six
Thirty
Five

AM

EIGHT HOURS LATER.

Eight full hours after I fell asleep I woke up to E2 climbing into bed. I immediately reached over and grabbed the monitor. When the screen lit up I saw the sweet sleeping E3.

Wow!

But then it occurred to me: The sound is off. The sound on the monitor is off. That means he didn't really sleep all night... he probably woke up and I didn't hear him through the closed doors. Oh My Gawd. I'm a terrible mother.  When Husband Dearest woke up I told him about my dilemma. His response? "Oh he slept all night, you're a great mom."

NOT.

He told me that he heard little baby E3 crying in the night, but he fell back asleep before he woke me up. So, two things: Why didn't he get up, is the most obvious, but secondly, my poor sweet innocent angel probably felt sad and scared and hungry and abandoned.

So, obviously, I am now wrought with mom guilt.

I think I will need him to sleep attached to me via boob all night to fix that.  Or, maybe leave the monitor turned off more often.

Ain't Nobody Got Time For That

It's after midnight. I just ate a Greek yogurt and a cheese stick. Riveting, isn't it? What's most incredible to me, is aside from dinner, this is the first time I have sat today.

Some days, most days really, are like this. Middle of the night baby feedings right off the boob, big kid bad dreams, early risers.  Breakfasts are poured from BPA free containers (also known as the boxes). Husband Dearest is kissed and shooed out of the door with coffee in hand. Our "at home" days twice a week are filled with background noise cartoons, potty breaks, Hot Wheels, pre-school and errands. Go here. Be there. Hurry. Hurry. Hurry! I find that I lose hours each day to baby and kid feedings.  I clean the whole kitchen only for it to be marred by sippy cups strewn about and crackers flying from a highchair.  Evenings are quick dinners, as healthy as I can make five ingredients and 15 minutes. Then it's gymnastics, BMX, and lately even motocross.

The spare moments I think I have are commuting to work, to the grocery store, to the bank, to the grocery store, the BMX track and the grocery store. Did I mention grocery store? All these Es in my house know how to eat.

I work three different part time jobs. Not including my "stay at home mom job." Depending on the day, a big chunk may be devoted to working at the gym or Skype teleconferences. Other days, I burn the midnight oil. Tonight is one of those nights.

I feel like I never have enough time. I know most parents can relate. I've also heard, and said, the adage "You make time for the things that are important." Well yes, that's true too. I know that leaning on the counter watching Facebook videos while the kids eat peaceful lunches is not productive and is time wasting, but sometimes my brain just needs to hibernate for a few minutes.

Although my heart is always full, so are my hands. What I really wish I could make room for is time.

S#*t Happens

Today I took E3's nine month photos. There's nothing spectacular about that statement, except, for the first time in his life I was late taking the pictures. Then he was grumpy and wouldn't cooperate to show off his newest skills. Ya know, like standing or whatever. I snapped a few pics, pulled off the stick-on monthly tie (WHY didn't I think of that!?) and wiggled him into an outfit.

A few hours later at the gym I was desperately needing to go to the bathroom. I was doing the pee-pee dance just like a potty training kid with a Big Gulp.  As I was about to pass E3 off to a friend, I felt the spread of warmth on my arm. He had shat himself. And shat himself in a big way. We follow baby-led weaning. A nine month old that mows through some berries, crackers, and an organic baby smoothie in the morning coupled with some nice long drinks off the boob really knows how to blow it out.

Before I messed my own self I hurriedly ran to the back office to change Sir Squirtsalot. You see that nice white onsie in those pictures? He (thankfully) had that on under his cords and button up as a layer of warmth shit protection. I remembered the Pinterest trick to rolling the once off the body as my friend asked how I would get it off of him. Mid process someone else said I should cut it off. Before he finished talking I was reaching for the shears.

That's right, ya'll. E3 shit himself so bad I had to use the Jaws of Life to free him.  Thankfully, I was able to make it to the bathroom without the same happening to me.

Later this afternoon my dear friend JMoo and her darling Kherbear came to play. I told 'Moo all about how close he was to walking on his own, but he was rather stubborn about it. After they left I realized I had missed my afternoon constitutional.

I have this gorgeous, big master bathroom that I can really enjoy a good poop in. Also, since I poop with an audience on the daily, it's got great space. This time, no exception. E3 came squealing in and ripped open one of the unsecured drawers. He loves to find goodies (pull out all my lady products) and toss them about. Right in the middle of me... well, pooping, I see E3 crawl halfway between the drawer to the toilet room in the master bath suite. He then took a football stance and popped himself up, unassisted. I've seen him do this once before.

Then, as I'm three feet away and ass-glued to the porcelain playground I watch my son take his first step.

Shit really does happen when you're a mom.

Organization Challenge Kitchen Week Wrap-Up

This was my first week with the A Bowl Full of Lemons Organization Challenge and it was quite the introduction.

Do you have any idea how much STUFF you have in your kitchen? Here's how you get a real, hit yourself over the head idea of it: Walk thru your kitchen and open EVERY drawer. EVERY cabinet. ALL of them.  Now imagine taking every last thing out of all of those drawers and cabinets. I'm talking down to AND INCLUDING the shelf lining out. Pretend you put it it all in a pile... THAT'S how much shit you have.

This challenge calls for you to empty all storage spaces and stack everything on the kitchen table and sort. Well, I must have a tiny kitchen table because as I was doing my glassware cabinet I realized that I have a shit ton of glasses, more plastic bar cups than necessary, and a ton of (very necessary) coffee cups. I decided to work in phases going cabinet by cabinet instead of the mass dumping of crap. It was a good idea too.  It took me a few days to complete the kitchen.  I do understand the value of taking everything out at once, but with E2 and E3 around, plus the dogs... uh uh no way.

I really wish I had taken more before pictures. However, I'd probably be too embarrassed to post them so I suppose it doesn't matter anyway.

Without getting too wordy, here is my Week 1: Kitchen

You won't see major differences in my overall look. Thankfully with a lot of help from Husband Dearest, our home is kept tidy.

Kitchen Before:

Kitchen After:

The biggest changes were decluterring on the sink side counter. Here's a couple hot spot places:

Before:

After:

Before:

After:

Before:

After:

Major strides in the actual organizing were behind the cabinet doors. Woof were things a mess. I don't have before pictures for most things, but here's how it looked as I worked along.

Under sink before and after:

I hung the recommended command strips for my scrub brushes, taking them out of the sink. Also, a caddy versus a disorganized bin makes a huge difference. Only the Sassy Spray was left out, as that's not a cleaner. Unless you have the sassy mouth of a four year old. It will clean that right up.

In Progress:

My purging was rather successful. Most of the fridge and over half of my spices were old and yucky. 

Spices and Baking supplies:

Medicine Mess:

The stackable bins and spice rack were found a Wally World. I was able to separate up medicine by preventative, sickys, kids, and prescription which we only have a couple of.

Glassware:

Obviously the most important one. OBVIOUSLY.

FRIDGE!!

The good old fridge needed purging and scrubbing. Also, I did go to the grocery store to restock before my hungry super fast BMX kid got home from Nationals. 

This whole week I spent at least and hour each day, and a few days several hours, working on getting things organized. Starting tomorrow I get to tackle the laundry room. I have a small laundry space that doubles as a garage entrance so it's going to need some work. I also have a ton of sewing to do for an outstanding order for my Etsy shop. Hopefully I can have that wrapped up and out Tuesday.

I also revamped some kitchen decorating. My favorite items are the three (was four- one broke. Boo!) recipes of my late Grandma's that I have displayed.

Tell me, did you do anything to organize your home this week?